Introduction
How many times have you had a friend or colleague tell you that they once were church goers but gave it up years ago? If you are like me, the number is beyond counting. I suggest these folks never really had an adult conversion where they experieniced the living Jesus in an powerful and personal way.
What can we do as parents to give our kids a solid, bulletproof faith that will resist the pull of the secular culture all around us? The answer is, “nothing.” As they grow, children, just as adullts, have to accept the call of God by their own free will. They need to understand that taking the narrow road is not easy. But that doesn’t mean that there aren’t things that parents can do to facillite their path to a lasting faith in Jesus. That begins by recognizing that we parents need to adjust to our approach as children get older.
As Children Develop…
Bringing up our children in a manner that will prepare them to experience Jesus as they develop through the difficult teenage years certainly begins with “baby faith.” Toddlers can be exposed to age-appropriate Christian media and parents can incorporate more Jesus-talk in their adult conversations. Letting kids play in the same room as the adults during house church meetings communicates by your actions how important faith is to you.
Expect children to start testing their baby faith as they get old enough to reason for themselves. They may begin by asking questions that get harder to answer as they age. Baby faith doesn’t work anymore, and parents need to shift thier approach to laying out a path will help them process the world around them the right way. As the teenage years arrive, children tend to rebel — often aiming their rebellion at the things that their parents are most passionate about. Parents need to shift to more adult strategies. Jesus-talk need to be more specific, with the mentioning of incidents in the past where faith has guided and encouraged them during difficult circumstances. Make some Christian biographies available and read and discuss together. Parents can share their own conversion experiences and how wonderful they were.
There are some strategies that are best avoided. Scaring children with a literal reading of the Book of Revelation, for example, might frighten them into an early, but false conversion that is not likely to last. They need to approach the gospel with love, not as fire insurance.
Don’t panic if they lose faith altogether and enter the adult world as non-believers. Nagging or engaging in arguments can only be expected to drive them further away. If you reach an impasse, don’t feel that you have been a failure, as the Lord may very well have plans for a later conversion and the baby faith that you gave them is still deep in their memory can only help them when that day arrives. After all, a saving faith is not like teaching them how to tie their shoes–it needs to be witnessed, not “taught.”
A Case Study
A fascinating case study of child conversion is found in Pierson’s biography of George Müller, the builder of the famous Christian orphan houses of Bristol, England, in the nineteenth century. Yes, the children were given regular biblical instruction along with their other lessons, but Müller did not simply let the matter go at that. Pierson writes of special “revival” activities, as in the following heart-warming testimony:
In January and February, 1860, another mighty wave of the Holy Spirit power swept over the institution. It began among the little girls, from six to nine years old, then extended to the older girls, and then to the boys, until, inside of ten days, above two hundred were inquiring and in many instances found immediate peace. The young converts at once asked to hold prayer meetings among themselves, and were permitted; and not only so, but many began to labour and pray for others, and, out of the seven hundred orphans then in charge, some two hundred sixty were shortly regarded as either converted or in a most hopeful state.1
Things to Avoid
Be careful in exposing children to apologetic literature. Books like Mere Christianity are powerful, but can lead to an intellectual knowledge of the gospel that can be upended by the apologetics of the world which a young person is sure to encounter in secular education if not from their peers (see Apologetics).
Another dead end is obscurancy, which Bernard Ramm defined as follows:
Obscurantism is the denial of the validity of modern learning. It is the stock method used by people who feel that modern learning threatens their beliefs. Obscurntism (secular and religious) has three characteristics: (1) It is selective, because the obscurantists must live in the modern technological society, which they can neither deny nor ignore. They therefore must select out those elements they must accept in order to live in the twentieth century. (2) It is hypocritical, for in every instance people who follow obscurantist tactics use elements of modern technological society to promote their obscurantist beliefs; for example, the telephone, the modern television industry, and modern office equipment with its electronic and computer technology. (3) It is systematic, for at any and all points where modern learning may undermine an obscurantist position such learning must be denied.2
It is simply not true that an educated person cannot have a saving faith. Believers can certainly live out their lives in an obscurant fashion and please God but attempting to teach children an obscurant understanding of Christianity will almost certainly lead to their wandering from the faith in due course.
Are Children “Saved”?
When loved ones die without saving faith, God sheds tears along with the rest of us. But what happens when the deceased is a child, especially before they have reached the age of accountability? Theology professor S. A. Nelson offered the following words of asssurance:
Children are innocent even though sharing with all humanity the effects of sin. They may sin but they bear no moral or religious responsibility for sin, and they are innocent of understanding. Responsibility comes with rational and moral apprehension. Until by their own attitude they place themselves outside the sheltered sphere, the child is safe within the love that saves.3
The biblical basis of this may be found in Rom. 7:7ff. Paul was born “alive.” When he became old enough to comprehend the law, he “died.” Later he became “alive” again when he accepted Christ.
Final Remarks
Remember that Jesus always welcomed and loved the children (Mt. 19:13-15). And when children do become old enough to receive baptism, which is their initiation into the community of faith (see Doctrine of Baptism), they should be regarded as “full” members. Remember the “Rule of Paul.” Everyone should be heard; no one should be silent (1 Cor. 14:26).
May each of your children be so blessed!
- Arthur T. Pierson, George Müller of Bristol and His Witness to a Prayer Hearing God. (New York: The Baker and Tayler Co., 1899), 346. ↩︎
- Bernard Ramm, After Fundamentalism (San Francisco: Harper & Row, 1983), 19. ↩︎
- Stanley A. Nelson, A Believers’ Church Theology
2nd Ed., (H. Drake, Ed.), (Taejon: Widow’s Mite, 1996), 138. ↩︎
Leave a Reply